Nothing to Say…or have I?
By Linda Guy, Abiding Life Ministries International, New Zealand
When Kathleen invited me to do a guest blog I immediately thought ‘what do I have to say?’ As I am going through a long, dry desert season, I discounted my suitability for the task. I feel like the dying miniature cactus underneath my flourishing palm plant. Dry and brown, it leans to one side, begging me to put it out of its misery and discard it. Yet I can’t give up hope for my cactus, or for me, that one day the greenish tinge of life will return.
I am curious though and so I Google ‘how to write good blogs’. If I were to blog it must be good, especially as a guest of a published author. The rules are daunting, especially about the need to be vulnerable and expose oneself. All the while, I am whispering in my heart, “Lord, if you have something to say through me, I’ll blog it.” That prayer didn’t sound quite right.
Does God even know about blogging? Is blogging a spiritual gift, like preaching, or teaching?
I decide I have nothing to say, decline the invitation and get back to work preparing for my upcoming ministry trip to Africa.
As I shuffle my notes for the Abiding Life seminars, the image of the cactus agitates my thoughts, with all its prickliness. Why hasn’t the Lord spoken to me like He does to Kathy? Why haven’t I got something to say? What is wrong with my Christian walk? What am I missing? What do I lack? Then suddenly, from under the piles of documents, a folder appears, then another and another. As I open them and flick through them, I have one surprising thought. Linda, you are a liar. You lied about God. He has given you His message; He has spoken to you; you do not lack anything. It is all here, but you buried it. You buried it with layer upon layer of your own resources and attempts to find something outside of Him. You did not believe that what He gave you was enough. That He multiplies the two fish if you release them to Him.
As I read my own notes, they minister Jesus’ life to me. Don’t get me wrong. There is no great revelation that the world has never heard, no material that makes me potentially a successful blogger. But there is treasure which was buried not on my desk, but in my heart, that unbelief had locked away. God is not a liar, but I am, for He does speak to each of His lambs. He will take us through whatever processes are necessary to turn the key to the treasure chest within our hearts, even if it is joining the blogosphere.